


Something monumental - Woman in white

by lavishsqualor



Series: Everything All The Time [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, preslash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-20
Updated: 2011-05-20
Packaged: 2017-10-19 20:07:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/204726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavishsqualor/pseuds/lavishsqualor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p><b>a/n:</b> My first fill for <a href="http://lavishsqualor.livejournal.com/11989.html">my claim</a> at <span class="ljuser ljuser-name_spn_30snapshots"><a href="http://spn-30snapshots.livejournal.com/profile"><img/></a><a href="http://spn-30snapshots.livejournal.com/"><b>spn_30snapshots</b></a></span>. Many, many, <i>many</i> thanks to my amazing betas, <span class="ljuser ljuser-name_glovered"><a href="http://glovered.livejournal.com/profile"><img/></a><a href="http://glovered.livejournal.com/"><b>glovered</b></a></span> and <span class="ljuser ljuser-name_silverraven"><a href="http://silverraven.livejournal.com/profile"><img/></a><a href="http://silverraven.livejournal.com/"><b>silverraven</b></a></span>, who were both so prompt and so thorough, and without whose help and encouragement I definitely wouldn't be posting this.</p><p><b>prompt:</b> Something monumental was about to happen; possibly the most monumental thing ever to happen anywhere, ever. - Doug Naylor, <i>Last Human</i></p>
    </blockquote>





	Something monumental - Woman in white

**Author's Note:**

> **a/n:** My first fill for [my claim](http://lavishsqualor.livejournal.com/11989.html) at [](http://spn-30snapshots.livejournal.com/profile)[**spn_30snapshots**](http://spn-30snapshots.livejournal.com/). Many, many, _many_ thanks to my amazing betas, [](http://glovered.livejournal.com/profile)[**glovered**](http://glovered.livejournal.com/) and [](http://silverraven.livejournal.com/profile)[**silverraven**](http://silverraven.livejournal.com/) , who were both so prompt and so thorough, and without whose help and encouragement I definitely wouldn't be posting this.
> 
>  **prompt:** Something monumental was about to happen; possibly the most monumental thing ever to happen anywhere, ever. - Doug Naylor, _Last Human_

The realization that Dean meant something more to Sam than just _brother_ began as a clenching of his chest, but quickly spread into his gut as he began to understand that Dean had meant _more_ for really as long as he could remember. He's not really sure when or exactly how it happened. He just remembers it hitting him one day. He was sitting behind his dad in the backseat of the Impala, and he looked at Dean in the passenger's seat, the sun coming through the front window and highlighting Dean's cheekbones so perfectly, and something stirred deep within him.

Which is why now Sam can't help but smirk to himself as he looks over, sitting in the Impala again, but this time with Dean in the driver's seat. Dean's busy thrumming his fingers on the steering wheel to some Led Zeppelin song, Sam's really not sure which, and he's got his arm resting out the open window. Though Sam's not familiar with the song, Dean must be, because his lips are moving slightly, mouthing along to the words of the chorus.

Sam feels like shit, yes – after all, the first girl he actually really loved and was committed to just burst into flames, right before his fucking eyes. And he's not sure how, but he's pretty damn positive that somehow it's all his fault. He feels awful, just awful, and so miserable that he's having a hard time thinking clearly. God, _Jess_. He misses her so much.

But deep down, no matter how ashamed it makes him feel, there's a tiny part of Sam that's not completely upset, a small part of him that is happy, well maybe happy's not the right word, but well, yeah, happy. He's with Dean again. And he missed Dean, no matter how much he tried to convince himself that he didn't during the last three plus years he was at school.

And if Sam's being completely honest with himself, which happens extremely rarely, he can't deny that Dean's part of the reason he left for Stanford in the first place. Probably a big part. Sure, him and Dad were both up in arms for a few years there, constantly at each other's throats, and Sam needed some fucking space to live his own life and make his own decisions, free from the ever-present drill sergeant tactics of their dad. But he was also scared. Of Dean. Or really, of himself, of his own feelings for Dean. And he'd decided he needed to let Dean also live his own life and not have to constantly worry, and compromise, and 'look after Sammy.' So he took off.

Since Sam's being completely honest, though, he can't really ignore the tinge of hope he's feeling. It's been years since he's been on a hunt with Dean, though this time it's different – they're searching for their dad instead of hunting a monster – but yet there's this little flicker of excitement building. And Sam's pretty sure that Dean's feeling something similar, because when he steals another glance at Dean, Dean feels it, and turns, returning Sam's gaze with one of his own, lips still synching with the song on the radio, but eyes full of his characteristic _I'm-up-to-something_ spark.

Sam is really quite thrown by what's just happened, with that woman in white, but much more so by the loss of Jess, and he hasn't even begun to come to terms with any of it. But also, he can't really believe this. Him and _Dean_ , on a mission. And if he actually thinks about it, actually lets himself feel, he really can't deny that it's been too damn long.


End file.
